My Grandmother passed away a few weeks ago. It was expected. The past couple of years had been really difficult for her as her diabetes and dementia worsened, she was carted in and out of the hospital with infections. Finally, it was decided to let her rest peacefully in her room at the nursing home and hospice was called in to make her more comfortable. The past few months she was really sick and slept most of the time. On a good day she would recognize my face and my dad's face. On a bad day she would ask annoyed, Who my dad was and why was he in her room. I had my last good visit with her about a week before she passed. At that point she was on morphine and asleep most of the time. Her eyes flickered opened and she looked at me. I asked if she knew who I was and she said "Of course I do honey, stand up here and let me see what you have on. " She was the fashion queen of her time, she loved beautiful things, and she loved clothes and shoes. So the first thing out of her mouth whenever she saw me was "What do you have on?" She was an elementary school teacher, a Sunday school teacher and a stickler for proper grammar. She hated to cook, loved to clean and had a house once decorated finely enough to be a spread in an Ethan Allen catalog. She was deeply religious, with a wicked, bathroom since of humor. She loved to shock people with her dirty jokes. She passed away peacefully at dusk, she was 88.
I had been with her just hours before and I knew it wouldn't be long. Dozens of nurses and nurses aids who had cared for her so lovingly came in to say goodbye. They talked to her and kissed her cheek as they cried. It's amazing how many people she touched in the 7 years she lived at the nursing home. She would always say to them "If you can't come in here with a smile on your face, you might as well turn back around and go out of here. "
At the funeral her four remaining brothers and sisters lined the casket to receive friends. She was the second born of the five. She went out in style, of course, she would have had it no other way. She had hand picked the music to be played. She was in her beautiful blue suit with her pearls. I will treasure all the great stories she told me. Stories about growing up on a farm in Carter County and sharing a room with her sister Chris. Stories about falling in love with my Grandpa at 15. About living in El Paso during war time and about the night my dad was born. She could always tell a great tale. I Spent nearly every weekend at her house from the time I was a toddler until I was 15. Nothing was off limits there. I would spend hours baking cookies and drinking cokes from little glass bottles late into the night. She would give me books to pour through from her collection. She gave me a copy of Ann Frank. My sister and I would play dress up with her best shoes and her dresser drawer full of costume jewelry. She would chase us around the back yard all afternoon and would let us help water her flowers. After her death,
I was given a beautiful portrait of her from the 40's when she was only 22. In it her blue eyes look amused, like just the two of you are sharing one of her jokes. Her mouth turned up in a slight, crooked smile. I was also given her bible, which I treasure. In the back she had hand written all her favorite passages. She was truly one of a kind and I will miss her deeply.
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